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- Historically, sweat has been an active ingredient in perfume and love potions.g
- In Bali, men believed a woman would fall in love if her suitor fed her
a certain kind of leaf incised with the image of a god who sported a very
large penis.e
- The Mexican chief Montezuma considered chocolate a “love drug” and
drank 50 cups of chocolate a day before visiting his harem of 600 women.a
- Scientists suggest that most people will fall in love approximately seven
times before marriage.h
- Some individuals who claim never to have felt romantic love suffer from
hypopituitarism, a rare disease that doesn’t allow a person to feel
the rapture of love.e
- Getting dumped often leads to “frustration attraction,” which
causes an individual to love the one who dumped him or her even more.f
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| Love is derived from the Sanskrit lubh, which means desire |
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- The term “love” is from the Sanskrit lubhyati,
meaning “desire.”i
- “Love” in the sense of “no score” in tennis dates
to 1792 and means “playing for love” or, in other words, playing
for nothing.i Other scholars claim that "love" as a tennis score
is a corruption of the French word for egg, "L'oeuf," because of
the egg's resemblance to a zero.m
- Engagement rings are often worn on the fourth finger of the left hand because
the ancient Greeks maintained that that finger contains the vena amoris,
or the “vein of love,” that runs straight to the heart. The first
recorded wedding rings appear in ancient Egypt, with the circle representing
eternity as well as powerful sun and moon deities.l
- Seminal fluid can potentially contribute to romantic love. Reports suggest
that the liquid that surrounds the sperm contains dopamine (“the pleasure
chemical”) and norepinephrine as well as tyrosine, an amino acid the
brain needs to manufacture dopamine.g
- The enduring symbol of love, Cupid (or Eros) is said to have come from
Chaos (“The Yawning Void”) and represents the primitive forces
of love and desire.n
- The word “lesbian” is derived from the Greek island Lesbos,
where the poetess Sappho composed her famous poems to her famous female lovers.l
- Roses are a traditional symbol of love and, depending on their color, can
suggest different nuances of love.n For example, red roses indicate passion
and true love. Light pink suggests desire, passion, and energy; dark pink
suggests gratitude. Yellow roses can mean friendship or jealousy. A lavender
or thornless rose can mean love at first sight. White roses mean virtue or
devotion. Some roses even combine colors to created more complicated meanings.k
- European males subconsciously seek out women whose waist circumference
is about 70% of their hips. Beauty icons such as Audrey Hepburn, Venus de
Milo, and even Twiggy had a waist ratio of exactly 70%.e
- When a person falls in love, the ventral tegmental area in the brain floods
the caudate nucleus with dopamine. The caudate then signals for more dopamine;
the more dopamine, the higher a person feels. The same system becomes activated
when someone takes cocaine.g
- When someone looks at a new love, the neural circuits that are usually
associated with social judgment are suppressed.e
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| The apple has historically been the ultimate symbol of love and sexual desire |
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- Since ancient Greece, the apple has been a symbol of love. The Celts believed
that the apple represented love because it lasted so long after being picked.n
- A study of college students who had just been rejected by their sweethearts
showed they had strong activity in the brain associated with the insular
cortex, the part of the brain that experiences physical pain.e
- Antidepressants may compromise romantic love because they enhance serotonin
levels. Higher serotonin levels blunt emotions and inhibit obsessive thoughts
about the lover, both crucial components of love.g
- A four-leaf clover is often considered good luck, but it is also part of
an Irish love ritual. In some parts of Ireland, if a woman eats a four-leaf
clover while thinking about a man, supposedly he will fall in love with her.n
- Some psychologists argue that we fall in love with someone who is similar
to the parent with whom we have unresolved childhood issues, unaware we are
seeking to resolve this childhood relationship in adulthood.f
- Studies show that if a man meets a woman in a dangerous situation (and
vice versa), such as on a trembling bridge, he is more likely to fall in
love with her than if he met her in a more mundane setting, such as in an
office.g
- Mystery or “the chase” is often a critical element in
romantic love. Sometimes called the “Romeo and Juliet effect,” a
situation with challenges or obstructions is likely to intensify one’s
passion for a loved one.g
- Scientists suggest that the advent of cooking led to healthier food which,
in turn, led to bigger brains and an increased capacity to woo potential
lovers with new forms of linguistic and artistic seductive flairs.g
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| Men and women are subconsciously attracted to those with a symmetrical face |
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- Men and women with highly symmetrical faces tend to have more lovers to
choose from. Additionally, men with symmetrical faces begin to have sex four
years earlier, have more sex, and have more affairs than their lopsided peers.
Women also tend to have more orgasms with symmetrical men.c
- Timing significantly influences love. Individuals are more likely to fall
in love if they are looking for adventure, craving to leave home, lonely,
displaced in a foreign country, passing into a new stage of life, or financially
and psychologically ready to share themselves or start a family.e
- Women around the world are more likely to fall in love with partners with
ambition, education, wealth, respect, status, a sense of humor, and who are
taller than they are. Women also prefer distinctive cheekbones and a strong
jawbone, which are linked to testosterone levels. During ovulation, women
become even more interested in men with signs of testosterone.g
- Men in love show more activity in the visual part of the brain, while women
in love show more activity in the part of the brain that governs memory.
Scientists speculate that men have to size up a woman visually to see if
she can bear babies, while women have to remember aspects of man’s
behavior to determine if he would be an adequate provider.d
- It is estimated that 40–70% of female homicides are committed by
their lovers and spouses.b
- In one of many polls on the subject, 60% of married American men say they’ve
been unfaithful, compared to 40% of American women.b
- The maple leaf is a symbol of love in China and Japan—and in North
America, it was often engraved on beds of early settlers to promote peaceful
sleep and pleasure.n
- Plato asserts in his Symposium that initially all humans were
whole, hermaphroditic beings with four hands, four legs, two identical faces
on one head/neck, four ears, and both sets of genitals. When these beautiful,
strong beings tried to overthrow the gods, Zeus split them into two—man
and woman— and created the innate desire of human beings for one another
to feel whole again.a
- Scientists suggest that merely staring into another person’s eyes
is a strong precursor to love. In an experiment, strangers of the opposite
sex were put in a room together for 90 minutes where they talked about intimate
details and then stared into each other’s eyes without talking. Many
felt a deep attraction for each other, and two married each other six months
later.e
- The urge to fall in love is, like sex and hunger, a primitive, biological
drive.f
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| Love and lust activate different areas of the brain |
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- Brains in love and brains in lust are not identical. Erotic photos activate
the hypothalamus (which controls hunger and thirst) and the amygdala (arousal)
areas of the brain. Love activates areas of the brain with a high concentration
of receptors for dopamine (associated with euphoria, craving, and addiction)
and its relative, norepinephrine.d
- Many cultures use knots as symbols of an eternal love that has neither
a beginning nor an end. Young Muslim women would send love messages to their
lovers using intricate knots.n
- The longer and more deliberate a courtship, the better the prospects for
a long marriage. People who have intense, Hollywood-type romances at the
beginning are more likely to divorce.h
- New research suggests that passionate love does not always decline over
time. In addition to exhibiting intense activity in the ventral tegmental
area of the brain similar to those in the early stages of love, brain scans
also show activity in the ventral pallidum, a region associated with feelings
of long-term attachment, and in the raphe nucleus, which is responsible for
higher serotonin levels, which lead to calmness and less obsession.d
- Love is not necessarily a guarantee that a marriage will last. Other factors
include a couple’s age (a husband who is nine or more years older than
his wife or who marries before the age of 24 is more likely to divorce),
those who are in their second or third marriage, those who had a child before
marriage, and finances. Factors not pertinent to success of marriage are
the number of children or their ages, the wife’s employment status,
and the number of years a wife has been employed.j
- Romantic love lasts just over a year, perhaps because the brain cannot
eternally maintain a revved-up state of romantic bliss. As romantic love
wanes, attachment love, a more stable love, sets in. To keep the passion
alive, experts suggest doing satisfying and exciting activities as a couple.g
- High levels of testosterone may suppress oxytocin and vasopressin (chemicals
associated with attachment love), which may explain why men with higher testosterone
levels tend to marry less often, be more abusive in their marriage, and divorce
more. When a man holds a baby, his testosterone goes down, perhaps as a result
of increased oxytocin and vasopressin.c
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| Men and women are biologically wired to express love in different ways |
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- Women often feel loved when talking face to face with their partner; men,
on the other hand, often feel emotionally close when they work, play, or
talk side by side.g
- To remain in love for a lifetime, therapists advise couples to listen actively
to your partner, ask questions, give answers, appreciate, stay attractive,
grow intellectually, include your partner, give him/her privacy, be honest
and trustworthy, tell your mate what you need, accept his/her shortcomings,
give respect, never threaten to leave, say “no” to adultery,
don’t assume the relationship will last forever, and cultivate variety.j
- Men are more likely than women to be more flexible in their romantic choices
when they are looking for short-term relationship—though when they
want a long-term mate, they become pickier about basic virtues.e
- Couples around the world who divorce tend to divorce around their fourth
year of marriage. After four years, marriages generally stabilize until around
eight years.g
- Being in love creates high levels of dopamine and norepinephrine. The despair
associated with unrequited love is associated with plummeting levels of dopamine.
To increase dopamine, rejected lovers should exercise. Sunlight is another
mood lifter, and smiling also activates nerve pathways that can give feelings
of pleasure.g
- One of the greatest predictors of love is proximity. Physical closeness
leads to increased emotion, and it is not unusual to hear stories of bosses
falling in love with their secretaries. On the other hand, scientists now
think that at a critical time in childhood (sometime between ages 4–6),
boys and girls who live in close proximity lose their ability to fall in
love with each other, perhaps preventing the destructive act of mixing one’s
DNA with close kin.g
- Kama Sutra (love + thread, rule) is an ancient text on love in Sanskrit
literature written by Mallanaga Vatsyayana around the second century A.D. Kama is
the Hindu god of love and also means desire. Sutra is a manual or
a guide.g
- The herbs associated with Venus (marjoram, meadowsweet, mint, thyme, and violet)
are said to be love inducing when mixed with those herbs sacred to Mars (basil
and broom). Spreading them on the floor or scenting the bridal sheets with
them supposedly evokes feelings of love.n
- The heart is a common symbol of love. Ancient alchemists used the symbol
of the heart for incantations of love. The heart can represent an inverted
triangle in which love is poured or carried. In Buddhism, the triangle is
an invocation of love energy associated with the divine. The heart can also
represent the wings of a dove, which was sacrificed in ancient Israel as
a gesture of love and which also served as a symbol of Aphrodite, the Greek
goddess of love.n
- On average, men around the world marry women who are three years younger
than themselves. In the United States, men who remarry usually choose a wife
five years younger; if they wed a third time, they often marry someone eight
years younger than themselves.g
- Studies show that the risk of a “secret love” being revealed
heightens romantic feelings for the partners, thanks to increased levels
of phenylethylamine (PEA).e
-- Posted August 4, 2009. Updated November 19, 2009.
References
a
Ackerman, Diane. 1995. A Natural History of Love. Vancouver, WA: Vintage
Books.
b
Ben-Ze’ev, Aaron and Ruhama Goussinsky. 2008. In the Name of Love:
Romantic Ideology and Its Victims. New York, NY: Oxford University Press.
c
Buss, David. M 2006. “The Evolution of Love.” The New Psychology
of Love. Ed. by Robert Sternberg and Karin Weis. New Haven, CT: Yale University
Press.
d
Cohen, Elizabeth. “Loving
with All Your Brain.” CNN.com. February
15, 2007. Accessed: July 20, 2009.
e
Fisher, Helen. 1992. Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage,
and Why We Stray. New York, NY: Ballantine Books. f
----. 2006. “The Drive to Love: The Natural Mechanism for Mate Selection.” The
New Psychology of Love. Ed. by Robert Sternberg and Karin Weis. New Haven,
CT: Yale University Press. g
----. 2004. Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love.
New York, NY: Henry Hold and Company, LLC.
h
Lewis, Thomas, M.D.; Fari Amini, M.D.; and Richard Lannon, M.D. 2000. A
General Theory of Love. New York, NY: Random House.
i
“Love.” Online
Etymological Dictionary. Accessed: July 15, 2009. j
“Love
Not Enough to Keep Couples Together.” MSNBC.com. July 14,
2009. Accessed: July 19, 2009.
k
“Roses—The Meaning of Each Color.” The Gardener’s Network.
1999-2008. Accessed: July 20, 2009.
l
Schulz, Christine and the editors of The Old Farmers Almanac. 1996. The
Book of Love: The Old Farmer’s Almanac Reconsiders Romance, Sex, & Marriage.
New York, NY: Yankee Publishing Inc.
m
TennisHistoryOnline.com. "Love." Accessed: November 19, 2009.
n
Tresidder, Jack. 2005. The Complete Book of Symbols. San Francisco,
CA: Chronicle Books.
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